Numb and confused..

Blah.. 2 posts in less than a day..

What the fark.. Not feeling too good. =(

Really ironic.. the irony. Never felt so emo for so long, forgotten how it felt. Now that I feel it again, I am reminded of why I hate it so much in the first place. And I loathe myself for letting me slip into that God-forsaken state of limbo, numbness and confusion.

Which is EXACTLY why I hate emotions. For I am subject to it. And I feel it with such intensity that I hate it.

Why me.

I don’t really wanna care. Yet, not to care would be irresponsible, which is not part of what defines me. I won’t run away from problems, yet, to face it also takes a mountain of courage and emotional strength. SO I’m here, thinking: “God, please don’t let me drain my emotional strength, not again..”

Gahh.. Childish thoughts.

2 more weeks to internal exam. I doubt it will be easy. Trying my best to cope. Study study study..

Sometimes I wonder how the hell did I ace SPM with such… unspeakable torment and despair during that time. I did it before, I sure as hell can do it now. Bring it on.. Gahhh..

THIS IS MADNESS!! THIS IS… me, just being me..

*******

I am a free spirit.. bound to no one but my own instinct and will. Tread not on my dreams, for it shall invoke a vengeful wrath none could withstand. Emotions are my eternal enemies; for it is my vow, for I let not petty feelings control this burning soul – me, forever intent on conquering new heights and defeating my inner demons..

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *