When does the fine line between genuine concern become overprotective instincts?

Why does feelings of overwhelming concern keep haunting me and following me like a plague? Is it so hard, so impossible for a normal person to stop feeling so helpless when he or she knows something, yet cannot do anything out of the fear that what he or she does will not make things better or even alienate the other party whom he or she cares for?

Maybe some will not feel helpless. Some people will go all out to protect the other person – subtly or obviously, eventually the person will at least do something which he or she thinks will make a difference and shield the loved one from perceived harm. Yet, what if people cannot, will not or simple unable to do said things? What if people are terrified of the consequences of not doing something to protect that person, and yet cannot do anything in order not to upset the status quo or the balance of relationships, be it family ties, friendships or even something more?

It is so very difficult to be that sort of friend who can genuinely care and yet not intrude. Then again, where on earth can you find such people? Friends that can love unconditionally and expect nothing in return? It is only human to want something, or at least subconsciously have an idea or vague concept of “friendship” created by society and imposed by peers – to want to feel cared for and to want to care for others.

And how does God then fit into the picture? God obviously wanted Man to have friends – otherwise we would all live lives of loneliness. Or perhaps God wants us, especially Christians, to focus on the greatest friend one could ever ask for – Jesus.

Being human, though, we still need someone to be PHYSICALLY there for us – laughing, crying, sharing the burden and joy. When the roots of friendship and intimacy takes place, and when the relationship turns into something that defies description and require no labels as imposed by society – humans then tend to cling on to the bond that ties them together. Clinging, desperately, fearing for external agents that would threaten or disrupt the perfect little world they are living in.

Thus, when little facts or gossip that is carried by the wind fatefully reaches the ears of said people, they fear; becoming concerned for their loved ones if the news will affect them, brushing it off as sordid if it does not.

Then the question remains still: when does genuine concern become overprotective instincts? Should one then leave it to God, for He knows best? And just watch helplessly, praying, biting their fingernails and shouting inside their hearts?

Or should they inform the concerned parties and warn them, at the expense of sounding like a paranoid or even someone who will be viewed as becoming too clingy and annoying?

Personally, I would just settle for the first option. Because I simply do not know any better.

Times like these are when people would start yelling: “Where is the freaking boundary?!”; especially when so much is at stake, and especially when one views the relationship as something really important to them.

The only choice then is to have faith and trust God, like a child..

I am referring to my JPA Interview Guide for Dummies post. Before the JPA interview on 5th or April (I think), the number visitors to my blog have spiked suddenly. When I checked the stats, whoa, people were really looking for information about JPA interview.

At one point it went up to more than 100 visitors per day o.O after that it went down to almost nothing, as usual.

Anyway, this only proves that people who are desperate or who want something really badly will search for it and do anything to help them be better prepared or better equipped to get it. It also proves that younger generation are more tech-savvy since they even went online to search for “JPA interview tips” lol..

I received a lot of emails and only replied 3 of them in time (since they all went to another email address I do not really use often) so yeah, to all that I replied late.. err sorry ah..  It really made my day though, when 1 of them sent an email to me saying how much the post helped her.

I hope my JPA Interview Guide for Dummies will get ever more popular and can help people.. who knows, someday it might become the “definitive guide” for people who wants to go for it. lmao omgwtf

Here is the link if you are looking for it.

Oh yea, if you are a JPA scholar and have any good ideas about preparing for the interview, do send me some suggestions and I will add it to the post and then maybe someday we can package it into a book and sell it and make big money mwahaha.

I know everybody dreads the official start of the summer term tomorrow. Seems like a dark moody cloud that will hang over pretty much the entire next 3 months of our lives.

Lazy to update blog nowadays. I went to UK and it was really fun. Tiring but fun. Saw lots of museums and the typical must-see places. Tower Bridge, Big Ben, Buckingham Palace, yada yada.

Hectic schedule and busy lives. Dissection in month and it will cover twice the amount of stuff than the one in winter term. Starting to panic a little.

I should start revising soon but really no mood nor will to do so.

Everybody says that in the first year, starting summer, hell will break loose.

I just hope I have enough energy left in me to stand firm against the tide.

As people grow, they learn things. And we all know that no man is an island. Everybody needs someone who can be counted on in times of difficulties. That is how the term “friend” came to be. I personally think, however, that the word means different things to different people.

People run away when they are afraid. Fear of the unknown, fear of insecurity and fear of loneliness. We run, hoping that the problem will go away. Sadly most of the time, it does not. I had to learn this the hard way.

When times go bad, many rely on friends and hope they can stay throughout the difficulties. It is worse if the problem arises between friends. I had the unpleasant experience and the scars remain until today to remind me. Yet, as are all things in life, the most wonderful things come in guises that we least expect. That friend went on to become one of my closest friends today.

Friendships endure storms, and at the end of it, if they survive, the bond becomes stronger. Ever wondered why there is a ‘ship’ in ‘friendship’? Like a real ship, to steer through the storm, all that it requires is teamwork. You need the captain and the crew. Both cannot work without the other. Friendship is a teamwork game.

Somehow, my mind fails to make the words express what I wanted to say. I realise that, the world is a much better place to live in if people just take everything as a stoic fact of life. And sometimes that involves stepping back, looking at the bigger picture and have the courage to laugh at yourself before inhaling deeply and trudge on, slowly, one step at a time.

I just passed biophysics and got credit for Anatomy and Czech recently. Praise the Lord!

It is really amazing sometimes, when you feel that there is nothing you can do and hopelessness and despair overwhelms the soul, and yet when the time comes, the Lord provides sustenance and His grace is more than enough to help you pass. I really thank Him for blessing me with favour with the biophysics professor. I really had no idea how to answer 2 out of 3 questions but luckily I still passed.

So now, there is only Cell Biology left and after that I am free for 4 weeks. Going to UK during the holiday, but feel really lazy to plan for it right now. Nowadays I just stay at apartment, going online, playing PC game (Dragon Age:Origins is awesome by the way) or just sleep most of the time.

It might be just me, but lately I noticed as if people around me are suddenly getting together out of the blue. My friends back in Malaysia are together. Two of my classmates finally got together recently after 1 year of pretending-the-thing-doesn’t-really-exist. Naturally, everyone was excited but the novelty wears off after some time. What, Cupid suddenly has too much free time?

Life is good, I am enjoying every moment of my time here. Whee..