The feeling of being conscious of everything around you leaves a very confusing state of mind. It feels as if drugs are coursing through my bloodstream and everything seems to be clearer.

Sometimes I wonder whether this is a blessing. I realized that since coming to Prague, I am able to remember a lot more things, things I could not imagine I could commit to memory. Sometimes things I see are seared into my mind, so I could not forget them. This state of consciousness takes its toll on me, though. Headaches, nausea and fatigue. I can concentrate and remember a lot of things in a short period of time, at the price of taking my brain to hell and back. At the end of it I can feel nothing except the intense pain and throbbing in my head.

And after sleeping it out, I could retrieve the memory especially if under pressure, for example, an exam or test. Which is a good thing, I guess. That kind of super-conscious feeling, of awakeness and razor sharp focus sometimes drains the life out of me. Bad thing is, I could not keep everything in for long. After 1 month, the memory is wiped off cleanly and I would have to start all over again.

Yet I thank God for this blessing He has bestowed on me. I count my blessings, and thank Him for everything He has done.